I am very bad at acquiring names. When I meet you for the first time, if you wear a name tag or hand me a business card, I will keep peeking as we talk. If I physically write your name down, please do not take it as a sign of disrespect. By doing so I am fairly likely to remember your name. The kinesthetic act of writing facilitates my making this sort of memory.
I have worked on this problem for years with little progress. If I try one of the prominent name remembering methods, it takes so much effort I don't catch what what you are saying. I focus on your visage and message. Your name just vanishes. If you are a really attractive woman, I confess I am more likely to remember your name. Perhaps the association with potential physicality trips the switch. I really don't know.
If you repeat your name it doesn't help. I remember people photographically. I can picture you in my mind without effort. Meeting again, I probably instantly notice if you have gained or lost weight or now fix your hair differently. If I look at you embarrassingly however, please prompt me. Kinesthesis is apparently part of my name memory-making process. If I make notes, whether reading a book, listening to you talk or studying for a test, I remember more. This works even if I never look at the notes again. I'm sure Dr. Oliver Sacks could explain all this very satisfactorily and probably has.
My son, Scrum trainer Scott Dunn, embraces the concept that focusing on weakness is looking at the wrong side of the coin. Because weakness is so difficult to “solve,” Scott helps clients focus on their strengths. He uses a well-respected tool developed by the Gallup organization, StrengthsFinder, to identify what people are good at. Effort put into employing and improving your strengths is much more likely to pay off than chipping away at those annoying weaknesses. There is a strong message about the utility of working in collaborative teams here which you can work out for yourself.
We should not ignore our weaknesses, but team with others who are strong in those areas. “Hire toward your weak side” is classic management advice and difficult for many to put into practice. If I hire people more qualified than me, the little voice inside your head natters, they will overshadow me and I will fail. Oh Fear, Fear. We all experience fear at some level unless we are psychopathic. Courage is moving forward in spite of the fear. Heroism is putting yourself in grave danger, often an individual's final act. Have courage, but being an Agile hero may well end your ability to contribute at your current place of employment.
In the West, we celebrate the Spartans at Thermopylae, who set a standard for ultimate courage and sacrifice, but not heroism. Heroism is impulsive, accidental, stupid or all three. No one should set out to be a hero. Heroism is the creation of war propagandists, politicians and other venial creatures. I profoundly respect fear. Fear is healthy, fear keeps us alive. Being fear's captive protects you if hiding is a successful tactic.
But cowering is not generally positive business practice. If you shut down with fear you cannot access your strengths. Be confident enough in your strength that you can act in the face of your fear. Easily said, I know. A bit of a slow learner in this regard, I spent 20 years in management before I was really confident enough to consistently hire to my weak side. If you are not there yet, you are in good company, but keep working on it. Moving past your fear is worth the effort. Revealing your weakness is optional.
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